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Posts tagged ‘Food’

Christmas Food Fight

“Move over,” said the sprout aloud
To the fare on Christmas Day
“For throughout the year I watch you all
In your very grand displays
And have to sit awaiting for
My turn to be the best
But wait I do with no complaint
For at least I can attest
To being the nation’s favourite
When it comes to this festivity
For like or hate me as they do
Few dare to exclude me!”

“Oh, get a life!” the Turkey groaned
“You silly Nobby green.
For it is as clear as clear can be
That I reign all supreme
At Christmas time for everyone
Knows on that day, I beat
Hands down beef, pork, lamb, goose and duck
As well as chicken meat!
For its not you but I’m the choice
At the nation’s Christmas feast
Yes, me, the Turkey, King of Meats,
Beats all other fowl and beast!”

“Now hang on,” a chestnut then piped in
“For though you may be king
Dear Turkey, and you may be picked
Dear Sprout, you small green thing!
I think you’ll find that it is me
Who most associate
With Christmas tidings every year
For I can celebrate
All roasty, come out of shell,
Appear as stuffing too
Be sweet or savoury as you know
So, beat the pair of you!”

And with that such a fight kicked off
Commotion in the larder store
As other foodstuffs pitched right in
Demanding they meant more
Yet hidden somewhere out of view
All quietly in his tin
Without vying to be the best
No arrogance or din
A little chap with starry hat
And sumptuous filled up case
Sat knowing in his heart that he,
Mince Pie, was worth first place!

For Christmas comes but once a year
And with it goodies abound
Chocolates, wine, sweets and savouries
In plenty are then found
Yet Mince Pie didn’t feel the need
To state his place for he
Knew Christmas was much more than that
And most importantly
He knew that it was more about
Each one playing his part
To bring about the festive spread
Be each a veg, nut meat or tart!

mince pies

With thanks to https://www.instagram.com/p/BcuFJ0MnuQ0/?taken-by=beckyp312 – all rights reserved to original photographer

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Lincolnshire’s Kitchen

In honour of Lincolnshire Day (1 October 2017)

Haslet, sausage, gingerbread
Poacher cheese and more
Plum bread, stuffed chine, all washed down with
Pints of Bateman’s beer for sure

Lincoln red beef, Lincoln blue
Not forgetting Cote Hill cheese
With samphire grown out near the Wash
Down from Grimsby fish smokeries

Pipers crisps, Dennett’s ice cream
Asparagus in fields
With tates and Lincolshire carrot pud
So much this county yields

Less not forget the humble fruit
That fell from apple tree
Prompting Newton to thus define
The force of gravity

 

The Battle Of The Bulge

When you start a new diet
You think openly
This is going to work
I’ll drop pounds – just you see

And you stick to it rigidly
Do just as your bid
Til the devil pricks consciousness
Bout the doubts you had hid

He tempts you with chocolate
Cakes even wine
Says, “Don’t worry – you’re gorgeous
And all will be fine”

“For these good things in life
Are for you to enjoy
And the weight loss can wait
For it’s just a decoy”

“It will starve you and make you
So sad” so he says
“A ruse – just ignore it”
He repeats in your head

And the idea of running
Or working out in the gym
He tells you is barmy
For your chances are slim

“Slim to achieve it
So why bother at all”
Says the devil incarnate
Pushing each one to fall!

But the strong knock him back
Say – “Devil be gone
For in part you are right
But in essence you’re wrong”

“Go dance with another
For today I will stick
With the plan that quite simply
Will get me fitter than fit”

“And keep me trim and in shape,
Lose the weight that I bear
So Devil get packing
You really don’t care”

For each knows the worth
Of losing those pounds
Not to look good in mirror
Nor the best when beach bound”

“But to save up reward
With good health to achieve
Reduce heart attack risk
And diabetes”

And maybe hold out
For a healthier you
A lighter inspired one
And that much is quite true!

Heartstrings

Numberelli

Facts and figures, frazzling brains
Calculations their campaign
Data cooked before the eyes
Digit crunching; their guise
Like a soup of statistics
For that special number fix
That adds up mathematically
To plates of Numberelli!

Spaghetti Numbers

Fast Food Fanatic

Fast food fanatic
Orders a slice of fat
A spoonful of grease
And a cupful of sugar
A heart attack in a bag
Just waiting to happen

The Barbecue Bash

So it seems that everything’s dandy
When you light up your yard barbecue
But some are quite techy and grumble
With moans of the hullabaloo

They don’t like the mass inconvenience
Of the smoke that it makes or the smell
Nor the fact you’re playing loud music
And wish that you’d just go to hell!

But in essence they’d like a kind invite
A beer and a bit of your fun
So that when you are burning the charcoals
They too can eat meat overdone!

English: Barbecue Bosanski: Roštilj Deutsch: Grill

English: Barbecue Bosanski: Roštilj Deutsch: Grill (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

A BBQ Haiku

Barbecue burning
Beers flowing; sausages sizzling
Quick! Watch the burgers!

 

BBQ